Remember July 2020? When we were all stuck at home, desperately refreshing Netflix for anything remotely entertaining? That’s when The Old Guard dropped into our laps like a gift from the streaming gods. Fast forward to 2025, and blimey, has it really been five years? The long-awaited sequel has finally landed, but cor, what a bumpy landing it’s been.
Let’s address the immortal elephant in the room – this sequel took its sweet time getting here. While the first film proper smashed Netflix’s viewing records (I distinctly remember watching it twice in one weekend, no shame), The Old Guard 2 has been caught in development hell since getting the green light in 2021. As someone who’s covered Netflix releases for years, I’ve seen my fair share of delayed projects, but this one’s had more setbacks than a Boris Johnson comeback tour.
Here’s the thing about Netflix films – they tend to zip through our collective memory faster than a TikTok trend. The streaming giant’s clearly cottoned on to this, hence why they’ve had to wheel out the cast for those “Previously on…” recap videos. It’s a bit like running into an old mate from uni and desperately trying to remember their name – slightly awkward and not entirely successful.
When it comes to the action sequences, The Old Guard 2 delivers the goods. Charlize Theron still kicks absolute bottom, and the fight choreography would make John Wick proper chuffed. But the plot? It’s messier than a night out in Newcastle. The narrative feels like it’s been through more rewrites than a government Covid strategy, resulting in a story that’s about as coherent as a Love Island contestant explaining quantum physics.
Without venturing into spoiler territory (we’re not monsters), the ending is properly baffling. It’s the kind of cliffhanger that makes you wonder if Netflix accidentally uploaded only half the film. Not since Game of Thrones’ final season have I sat there thinking, “Hang on a minute, is that it?”
Absolutely, mate. Even with Netflix’s recap videos, you’ll be more lost than a tourist in Birmingham without watching the original.
If you’re in it for the action, yes. If you’re hoping for a coherent story that ties everything together neatly, prepare to be disappointed.
Given that cliffhanger, Netflix clearly hopes so. But let’s pray we don’t have to wait until 2030 for it.
The Old Guard 2 feels like a classic case of “difficult second album” syndrome. While it packs enough punch to satisfy action fans, the convoluted plot and frustrating cliffhanger might leave you feeling short-changed. Much like that takeaway that arrives two hours late – it’s decent enough when it finally shows up, but you can’t help feeling it should’ve been better.
Share your thoughts on that ending below – just remember to keep it spoiler-free, yeah? We’re not barbarians!